Seeking Balance...

I’ve had some really interesting conversations with people about “balance” in life. Some people completely refute the idea thinking it’s an impossible goal, so why bother. These people may go all in on work projects and let their family duties fall by the wayside during that time. When the big work project is done they come back into their family life wholeheartedly. Other people take it to an extreme when thinking of the literal “time” that is allocated to each area of life: if I spend 8 hours at work, then I must spend 8 hours at home with the family. If I spend 1 hour with this child, I must spend 1 hour with that child/my husband/my sister/etc. This can be unsustainable and lead to guilt because there are only so many hours in the day and keeping track is hard!

My opinion about balance is that is both and still neither of the situations above. It’s about how you FEEL inside about those areas of your life. When you think about work do you feel as if you are spending the amount of time on it that it needs and deserves? Yes? Then it’s balanced. When you think about your family do you feel as if you are spending the amount of time on them that they need and deserve? Yes? Then that also is balanced. When you think about the last time you did something that was JUST for yourself, does it feel like you are spending the amount of time on yourself that you need and deserve? No… then you know what that means!

“Balance is how you FEEL about each area of your life, not equality.”

This lovely blog image is courtesy of my friend Michelle Opaski

Think of the rocks balanced on a cairn (hint, you don’t need to imagine it, there are photos of them all over my website for a reason!), are they all the same size? Nope. Size doesn’t dictate balance. Position does. Priorities and values, intentionality… they all lead to balance in life. When you have your priorities known in your mind, you aren’t drifting through your days and weeks. By setting intentions around your time, you are able to test how you feel. If you feel "off" with an area of your life, you can tweak your activities on your schedule until you feel more balanced.

There are so many similarities between how we think about time and how we think about money. Go ahead, think of a situation about time, and substitute the word money in the thought. The sentence works, doesn’t it!? And I’m willing to bet it also feels like a thought you would have, too. It also doesn’t help that we have sayings in our culture like “time is money!”…

I think that many women feel that spending time on their money isn’t a “noble” use of their time, and I completely disagree with that notion. Intention around your money can have enormous ripple effects throughout your whole life. Being intentional with your money almost certainly leads to less stress, which gives you more mental space to spend on who or what you want to be spending more time on. I recently asked on my Facebook page “if you weren’t bogged down with thoughts about money, what would you be thinking about?” and the responses were telling! People said they would be thinking about activities they could do with their family that weekend, or how to spend their vacation they have coming up, switching careers, etc.

So, if money wasn’t a big stressor for you, what amazing things would you be doing with all that mental headspace you now had freed up?